Reality TV, as we know – as we all SHOULD know – is scripted, planned and edited with precision a brain surgeon would be proud of, supposedly representative of ‘real’. With tongue firmly in cheek, the talented performers of Playon.productions aim to take it down – or rather, down-under – with this fast-paced, chaotic, too-short show featuring ‘eight ordinary Australians’ as they commune on Rottnest Island for the season finale of, guess what… The Real Australia.
Every tragedy ends with a death (or similar), every comedy with a wedding, so… James is betrothed to Kylie, who has a sister, Danni, who’s a bit grumpy about it all. Sam, iPad permanently in hand, runs the wedding destination and is trying to keep everything on track but has committed a romantic error involving Brendan, who will shag – or imbibe – anything. Lily is single and unattractively desperate to be not so. Best Man Darren is somewhat distracted by Kylie but can’t say anything. And fails to recognise, or fall for, any of Lily’s entreaties. Opal is in charge of wedding vibes, but also a venomous mouth, particularly where Sam is concerned. They all – save the beleaguered groom, James – are full of BS, typecast as the blowsy one, the sensitive one, the toxic masculinity one, the needy one, the hippy one, the… you get the picture.
Then James confesses to Lily that he’s not at all sure about this marriage, Kylie overhears and confronts him, oh, the drama… Darren arrives to rescue Kylie, Lily and Opal finally get things on with the help of some astrological currents and if that’s not enough twists, Darren admits to Kylie, post-shag, that he’s not sure about things now.
Crammed in is a funny sketch where Danni showboats about having ‘travelled’, describing ‘Keemonos… and the film thing at Canness’… and Sam, Brendan and Darren bicker about what qualifies one to be a ‘real’ Australian. For fast-paced you could google-translate to ‘bewildering’ and its shame that at the point it appears to hit its stride, it ended. It didn’t come across as especially Australian; there are horrors like this on TV screens in every country nowadays. And, given Rottnest Island is actually a real place, no Koalas, Kangaroos, not even a loveable little Quokka in sight.
Reviewer: Roger Jacobs
Reviewed: 8th August 2025
North West End UK Rating: